Mr. Lonelyhearts
The good people at Bookninja have just posted a new essay by Toronto author Derek McCormack about his struggles with post-publication depression. As McCormack explains, the 2003 publication of his novel The Haunted Hillbilly – about a gay tailor and his obsessive, somewhat psychotic pursuit of Hank Williams – was followed immediately thereafter by a nasty case of writer’s block and, worse, a raging, totally unhealthy obsession with CSI star Eric Szmanda.
At first I didn’t like him. His hair, his character, his acting style – all of it annoyed me. Then, stoned and soused, I noticed his lips. And his eyes. And ass. I Googled him. Mapquested him. I bookmarked a bunch of Szmanda-themed websites. Fanlistings. Fan forums. Within weeks I’d read where his parents live, where his brother works. I’d discovered his home address in Hollywood.
I mailed him The Haunted Hillbilly. “To Eric,” I inscribed it, “with admiration.”
McCormack fesses up to a whole litany of crazy, Szmanda-mad behaviors, and then attempts to figure out if they were just a natural extension of the isolated writer’s life.
As a teen I wrote [a] Hardy Boys book. I still have it. Joe and Frank are holed up in a hotel room. Frank administers an enema to Joe. With champagne. Joe jerks off into the empty bottle. Filling it. A magnum!
All of which made me wonder: Am I lonely because I write, or do I write because I’m lonely? Is all my writing a form of fan fiction? Is all my fiction slash?
I don’t gett he reasoning behind this article. So this guy is in love with Eric and sent him a book? Why does he want Eric to star in a movie made from the book or is the guy just a nut-case/stalker?
what the hell? I’m eric szmanda’s biggest fan EVER but I would never ever stalk him.